when leaving is a good thing

“But at the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Mark 10:6-9)

“a man will leave his father and mother” (a man will no longer be dependent of his father and mother, and neither will they be dependent of him from this moment on)

Regardless of the monetary cost of the wedding, regardless of the size of the house, regardless of the balance of the savings account, if the man did not “leave” his father and mother to be joined to his wife, that wife can become the most miserable person ever. Everything in that relationship will be dictated by either his parents or even relatives or friends.

When the father and mother of the bride purchase the wedding, they often believe to have a stronghold against every decision to be taking place within their daughter’s family.

A successful marriage requires the divorce of the man to his father and mother. Without that separation, the man’s heart will still remain with his parents. His heart cannot be in two places at once.

This is why polygamy, even while recorded in the Bible, has proven time after time to be an error. The man cannot serve two masters. He will love one and hate the other.

“But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.” (1 Corinthians 7:2-3)

Sometimes, the “leaving” (or “divorce” I’d rather call it sometimes) needs to happen against friends, relatives or even children from previous marriage or relationship. For even any of these parties can have a stronghold against any progress of the existing or new marriage.

I have seen religious leaders tearing down marriages with the slightest movement of their finger, because one or both spouses allow the leaders to have such influence. I have seen spouses imploding their marriages with the lust (not love) for their children. All of a sudden, according to one spouse, the other spouse is no longer qualified or fit to raise their child or children and is now on the search for a new spouse.

The bottom line is this. If you think that you are married but you are not joined to your spouse in agreement with what God wants for the two of you, you’re not married.

Just look at some of the natural benefits of the two of you being joined together:

“Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.” (Ecclesiastes 4:11-12)

The three-strand cord is composed of you, your spouse, and God. And in God you have Jesus and the Holy Spirit, someone who knows suffering and someone who comforts.